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SCREW THE Y

We have some new friends here at byusucks.net who have a motto we completely agree with: SCREW THE Y.  We couldn't agree more.  Screw the Y.  Screw Provo. Screw their pompous and arrogant fans.  Screw the entire worthless institution.   Screw 'em.

Our friends over at ScrewTheY.com are the makers of some of the coolest byu rivalry shirts ever. The staff here aby byusucks.net owns about five different Screw The Y shirts like "Hey Max, this Bud's on you and your mom" and "Max hates me" and "God I hate byu."  We love it.

screw the y
 

Stop by Screw The Y and pick up some fine threads and let the world know that BYU SUCKS!

Thanks to the New Mexico Lobos

We'd like to personally thank the New Mexico Lobos for beating the zoo in men's basketball last night.  You are our current favorite team!  YAY LOBOS!

LDS Church Releases Statement On Max Hall Comments

SALT LAKE CITY, UT - In response to BYU quarterback Max Hall's recent statements, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has adopted an amendment to its Thirteenth Article of Faith. The revised declaration now reads, in pertinent part, "We believe in being honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men except those affiliated with the University of Utah, its football team, or fans thereof."

Additionally, LDS Church spokesman LaVerne Christiansen stated that General Authorities who had received academic degrees from the University of Utah would be immediately granted emeritus status and removed from their callings. "Except for President Monson," Christiansen explained, "because he repented of his [University of] Utah Bachelor's Degree by getting an MBA from the Lord's One True University."

In related news, church scholars engaged in the Joseph Smith Papers Project have reported that they have recently discovered Smith's personal notes regarding the "inspired" translation of Matthew 5:44. "The King James Version has Christ telling his disciples to 'love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you,' which is all very good," said Project Editor F. Merrill Baker, Jr., "but the [newly discovered] Prophet's translation includes a caveat, making it clear that the Lord's pronouncement doesn't apply to the Utes."

"It's marvelous," continued Baker, who holds a doctorate in archival archaeology from Brigham Young University, "and it reveals that even though the University of Utah wasn't founded until 1850--more than five years after his death--Joseph Smith knew by the spirit of prophecy and inspiration that its football fans would spill their beer on BYU fans."

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